Our lives are strung together by seconds, minutes, and hours. Days, weeks, months, and years. Boxes to check marked by age and gender – dictated to us to be the norm. Deadlines to meet – forged by societal expectations instilled upon us since birth. College by X. Career by X. Marriage by X. Babies by X. Homeowner by X. We may impose expectations on ourselves that come from some voice within, influenced by the above, centering on words like, “success”, “achievement”, “status”, “wealth”, “affluence”, “worthy”, “accomplished”, “important”, and “majority”. 

Sometimes, parents and prominent figures play a role too, putting us on a fast track to somewhere they want us to go or someone they want us to be. They can also set us up for failure or throw us off our own course, knowingly or unknowingly. Often, we find generational cycles of trauma repeating. Either way, some ways, or all ways, woven into the fabric of our lifetime are the choices we make that determine our course – influenced by nature, nurture, and all that surrounds us as decisions are made and actions are taken.

There are decades that make us and seconds that can break us. There are moments gone in a flash while others seem to drag on endlessly. All the while, time ticks on – unaware that living things only have so much of it to use. Time doesn’t know that a lot of us may squander it, that most of us long for more of it, that work shouldn’t be the brunt of it, that at times we fear it, that we don’t always know what to do with it, that we think we have enough of it, that quality should lie before it, or that might wish to turn it back when we feel like we fucked it up or took it for granted. 

In our youth, we rush time. Hurry up to grow up.

In young adulthood, we underestimate time. It’s infinite and on our side.

In our midlife, we chase time. So much to do and so little time in the day to do it. 

In old age, we question time. How much of it is left for us? 

“I can’t go back.” 

“I can’t start over.”

“I can’t do this again.”

“I can’t change who I am.” 

“I can’t undo what I’ve already done.”

I’ve heard these lines so many times, most often in my own voice. And all but one are a lie.

You have the time. Right here. Right now.

To leave a toxic, unhappy, or unfulfilling relationship or job.

To cease a joyless pursuit.

To start a new career.

To write a book.

To go back to school.

To play an instrument.

To ask for help and support.

To fall in love.

To take that adventure.

To pursue a passion.

To climb that mountain. 

To chase our dreams. 

To reinvent ourselves.

To break some rules.

To let go of expectations, ours and theirs.

To break down walls.

To heal.

To end generational cycles.

To look fear in the face.

To live life the way we want to.

If we don’t know how much time we have left, how do we know we’re too late? Guess what? We don’t. No one can turn back time. We know this. None of us can go back to start over, at least not in this lifetime. But what if we started from here? Today. Now. Tomorrow. This week. We can change the ending by grabbing a hold of the present narrative. Only our past is locked in. And that’s okay. We’re not meant to turn back time. We’re meant to live out the time before us.

We all have a clock. Grab its hands. Make it count.